Quotes and Wisdom
from the Top of the Mind™
from the Top of the Mind™
Change
"We cannot discover new lands until we first have the courage to lose sight of the shore."
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"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So, throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
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"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So, throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
I ran across these thought-provoking quotes recently, and have chosen them for this week's selection because they promise to give us another bit of encouragement when we are facing the unfamiliar, and wondering if we should dive in or stay with what we know. Of course, I always like to speak to both sides of an issue when appropriate, and therefore, it's important to note here that I (and this week's quotes) aren't advocating always leaving what we know for something new. The question would seem to be, "Are we happy where we are, is there meaning and value to the life we have created? Does it make the statement we want to make about who we are? Would we recommend this life to our children or someone we love?" Or, is something missing? Are we just going through the motions, and do we feel that "new lands" or the search for something new is what is called for?
If the answer is "new lands," then we must recognize that in order to discover this new way of being, we can't just wade out into the water. We must have the courage to dive in and give up the security of the familiar and the safety of the shore, and strike out to previously uncharted waters.
Again, just to be clear, this quest for "new lands" doesn't always mean leaving a person, job, or part of the country. In fact, the idea that somehow our happiness will be found over the next hill, or in the next relationship, job, state, etc., can be just as problematic as the belief that we are trapped where we are and can't change. The truth is, the answer to the question: "Is my happiness to be found within, or do my surroundings play a major role in the quality of my life" is . . . "Yes!"
Like most questions in life, the answer is rarely "either/or" but "both/and." We can't find happiness and meaning in life until we are clear about who we are, what we stand for, and the qualities and characteristics that define us from the inside out. . . and . . . we can't be happy in a job, relationship, or situation that is incongruent with those beliefs, or in an environment that doesn't celebrate who we are. So, what's the solution?
I suggest that we start where we have the most influence, which means that we first take responsibility for becoming the person we want to be, and then determine whether where we are is where we should be. In other words, if we are willing to first ensure that we are being true to what we believe . . . that we are thinking, feeling, and acting in a way that makes the statement we want to make about who we are, and in a way that we would recommend to someone we love . . . then all we have to do is notice whether this more purposeful way of being is congruent with the person, job, or life in which we currently find ourselves.
Of course, neither of these processes or determinations are easy. It will take courage to let go of (lose sight of) our internal shores, or old familiar, habitual ways of surviving. Further, it will take even more courage to take 100% responsibility for this internal process of evaluation and change, rather than blaming how we feel and who we have become on some external person or situation.
Next, it will certainly take courage to determine whether our job, relationship, and/or our current life, in general, is a place where the person we have chosen to be is welcomed and celebrated. . . and of course, whether we would recommend this current life experience to someone we love.
However, if we are willing to find and nurture this courage, and be willing to discover new lands, both internal (and if necessary) external, then the potential that we will create a life we can be proud of and happy within will increase exponentially.
All of this reminds me of a song by David Wilcox called, "Farthest Shore," from his album entitled, "Big Horizons." As you read the lyrics, I encourage you think of what it can mean, both to our internal and external search for "new lands."
"Farthest Shore" by David Wilcox
We were there in the woods by the water
We left our packs up against that willow tree
We dove right in, keeping just what we were born with
Our Memories, Knowledge and our Dreams
As I swam away from our possessions
I imagined that they were gone forever more
And for once I was glad that all I treasured
Would still be with me as I reached other shore.
When my time to live this life is over
I'll tip my hat when I think about that swim
And of all the things that make a life worth living
That only come to those who dive right in
So...Let me dive into the water,
Leave behind all that I've worked for
Except what I remember and believe
and when I stand on the farthest shore
I will have all I need.
If the answer is "new lands," then we must recognize that in order to discover this new way of being, we can't just wade out into the water. We must have the courage to dive in and give up the security of the familiar and the safety of the shore, and strike out to previously uncharted waters.
Again, just to be clear, this quest for "new lands" doesn't always mean leaving a person, job, or part of the country. In fact, the idea that somehow our happiness will be found over the next hill, or in the next relationship, job, state, etc., can be just as problematic as the belief that we are trapped where we are and can't change. The truth is, the answer to the question: "Is my happiness to be found within, or do my surroundings play a major role in the quality of my life" is . . . "Yes!"
Like most questions in life, the answer is rarely "either/or" but "both/and." We can't find happiness and meaning in life until we are clear about who we are, what we stand for, and the qualities and characteristics that define us from the inside out. . . and . . . we can't be happy in a job, relationship, or situation that is incongruent with those beliefs, or in an environment that doesn't celebrate who we are. So, what's the solution?
I suggest that we start where we have the most influence, which means that we first take responsibility for becoming the person we want to be, and then determine whether where we are is where we should be. In other words, if we are willing to first ensure that we are being true to what we believe . . . that we are thinking, feeling, and acting in a way that makes the statement we want to make about who we are, and in a way that we would recommend to someone we love . . . then all we have to do is notice whether this more purposeful way of being is congruent with the person, job, or life in which we currently find ourselves.
Of course, neither of these processes or determinations are easy. It will take courage to let go of (lose sight of) our internal shores, or old familiar, habitual ways of surviving. Further, it will take even more courage to take 100% responsibility for this internal process of evaluation and change, rather than blaming how we feel and who we have become on some external person or situation.
Next, it will certainly take courage to determine whether our job, relationship, and/or our current life, in general, is a place where the person we have chosen to be is welcomed and celebrated. . . and of course, whether we would recommend this current life experience to someone we love.
However, if we are willing to find and nurture this courage, and be willing to discover new lands, both internal (and if necessary) external, then the potential that we will create a life we can be proud of and happy within will increase exponentially.
All of this reminds me of a song by David Wilcox called, "Farthest Shore," from his album entitled, "Big Horizons." As you read the lyrics, I encourage you think of what it can mean, both to our internal and external search for "new lands."
"Farthest Shore" by David Wilcox
We were there in the woods by the water
We left our packs up against that willow tree
We dove right in, keeping just what we were born with
Our Memories, Knowledge and our Dreams
As I swam away from our possessions
I imagined that they were gone forever more
And for once I was glad that all I treasured
Would still be with me as I reached other shore.
When my time to live this life is over
I'll tip my hat when I think about that swim
And of all the things that make a life worth living
That only come to those who dive right in
So...Let me dive into the water,
Leave behind all that I've worked for
Except what I remember and believe
and when I stand on the farthest shore
I will have all I need.
Take care and God bless, Dr. Bill