"Character isn't simply inherited. We build it daily by the way we think and act, thought by thought, action by action. If we let fear, anger, or resentment take possession of our mind, these thoughts and actions become self-forged chains. . . chains of habit that are often too light to be felt until they feel too heavy to be broken."

– Adapted from Helen Douglas and Warren Buffet

For this week's selection, I have chosen to combine two quotes: one from Helen Douglas and another from Warren Buffet, and I have adapted them to our goal of living life "on purpose." I have taken the liberties of this combination and adaptation because of this new quote's ability to inform our thoughts and lives with respect to both the concepts of "character" and "habits"...two very powerful aspects of life.

The first part of the quote speaks to the fact that our character isn't simply inherited from our past but actually is formed by our thoughts and actions on a moment-by-moment basis. In my humble opinion, this is the good news because it speaks to the possibility of influence, or how we might shape our character by becoming more aware of how these thoughts and actions are defining who we are, and becoming more skilled at the process of choosing what we continue to think and do "on purpose." Of course, while true, these words alone would not be enough to use as a weekly selection for I have spoken to this concept often in this format. However, when combined with the rest of the quote, they become an introduction to a more complete look at life and how we can become more influential in the creating of our experience.

For example, the second part of the quote speaks to the perspective that is the foundation of my latest book ("Life from the Top of the Mind"), and in almost all of the presentations I have had the pleasure of sharing with audiences over these past few years. It speaks to how, if allowed, our fears, anger, and resentments can "take possession of our mind." This does, of course, speak to how the part of our brain responsible for interpreting incoming data (the limbic system) will often see situations such as traffic, deadlines, other people's behavior, etc. as threatening or dangerous, and engage the fight-or-flight systems located in the lower 20% of our brain while bypassing the upper 80% where our higher-order thinking is found. This is what Daniel Goleman (in his book "Emotional Intelligence") calls "neural hijacking," and in many ways it's like allowing the fearful or worried part of the brain to "take possession," and thus determine what chemicals are produced and what aspect of the nervous system is activated.

The third part of this week's quote speaks to how this process of "taking possession" can become so common place that it becomes a habitual way of life for many of us. I love the part of the quote that defines these habits as "self-forged chains" that are often "too light to be felt until they feel too heavy to be broken." While this certainly describes what could be perceived as a problem, I prefer to look for the solution. For example, while small and light chains are certainly easier to ignore than those which are large and heavy, they are still chains, and as such, can be noticed if we are willing to be sensitive to their formation and presence. Then, using this new awareness of what is being formed, we can either choose to allow these habits to define who we are, or "reform" them to fit a higher sense of purpose. Or, if we find that old habits have hung around so long that they have become large chains which hold us down or hold us back, we can choose to throw off these old restraints and thus free ourselves from the past as we create a more purposeful present and future.

Bottom line, it seems as if this week's quote allows us to look at our old habits in new ways. Then, if we find that the habits we have created are chaining us to a way of life that is incongruent with our highest purpose or who we really want to be, we can begin to make different choices, create new habits, or reforge more purposeful links that will allow us to create or build our character in new and more purposeful ways. As we take more responsibility for this process, the fact that the links of thought and action that form our character are "self-forged" becomes the good news, for it means we are the craftsman that ultimately decides whether these new chains will be made of gold and designed to hold something precious, or made of iron and designed to keep us in our place. Here's to a future of more purposeful craftsmanship.

Take care and God bless, Dr. Bill